Tyan's Photoblog
Caleb
Posted by tyan (Singapore, Singapore) on 22 February 2008 in People & Portrait.
After the 罚站 incident,i was checking on Caleb's behaviour closely.
Yesterday when i went to fetch Caleb from school,i overheard his form teacher telling another mom that her son was hit by another boy in class.I didnt hear the full conversation and i think paranoia got the better of me and i began to wonder if Caleb was involved.
The teachers were rushing in for the afternoon session so i left.On our way to the train station,i was 'grilling' Caleb:
"Were you made to stand today?"
He nodded his head.
Shucks.
"Did you beat your friend?"
He nodded again.
Darn.
"Was it R?"
He nodded again.
I got really upset.I asked him why he did it,till i teared,and he started tearing too.
He's been ok at home,why does he seem so different in school? Have i been staying at home in vain?Is it i am not teaching him well?I felt a sense of failure,discouragement and acute loneliness.
I decided to talk to the form teacher.I left a message for her and she called me back.She is the form teacher while the other teacher i talked to another day was a younger assistant teacher. I started telling her about the mannequin,罚站,my earlier conversation with the assistant teacher about him being influenced by D and whether Caleb really hit R.
I thought,its time to buy a cane.
Then,to my utter surprise,the form teacher said,she has never punished Caleb,not even anyone in class because they are too young.She also said she has never used 罚站. In fact,she said that Caleb was well behaved in class except that sometimes he may appear restless.He gets loud when with D but they stopped whatever they were doing when teacher told them to.
She also added that Caleb gets restless by the time they assemble in hall before school ends and he will say,"I very tired."
Which i found him recently saying it to get attention and kisses from me.
Teacher also told him to walk on his own when i fetch him because i have to carry his little brother and not to fall asleep on the way back so that i do not have to carry him.
What a thoughtful teacher!
It turned out that R was hit by a boy from another class.
I heaved a big sigh of relief.All in all,the teacher assured me that Caleb was generally well behaved in class.
Finally,the truth is out.To think i have been tormenting myself thinking what a horror Caleb has become!
The mystery remains where he learnt the word 罚站 and why he nodded when i asked if he hit his friend.And why the assistant teacher gave me the impression that Caleb was made to stand when he wasnt.
Anyway,i learnt my lesson,not going to ask Caleb next time,just call the form teacher and ask.
Michael Skorulski from Cigel, Slovakia
Great shot and very cute. It looks like there are interesting places for children there.
22 Feb 2008 6:10am
Mandy from South Africa
Such a cute photo my friend!! And hey - don't beat yourself up about these things. When Ethan was not even 2 yet he bit a boy from his class on his cheek and like you I had walkewd in when the teacher was telling hte mommy and I just had a sinking feeling that it was my "sweet" boy. Anyway, the teacher confirmed that it was in fact Ethan but that it was normal for little ones and I mustn't worry, he was merely trying to voice his opinion without words. She assured me that children their age bite kids when they invade their personal space and biting is the quickest way to get them to back off - because they can't voice their frustrations. So don't worry dear, you're doing a GREAT job!!! Caleb hasn't turned into a little horror and won't do any time soon as he has such a special mom! :)
22 Feb 2008 6:37am
Xinyi from Singapore
gosh.. wat a relief.. do u tink it's becos by puttin caleb in d sch, he gets jealous when ian gets more attn at home?
22 Feb 2008 6:51am
@Xinyi: not sure leh,he seems pretty used to Ian already.And he really seems to enjoy school too..
e. from New York, NY, United States
*hug* I'm glad that's all sorted out. He seems like a very well behaved boy. :)
22 Feb 2008 8:10am
Tricia from Melbourne, Australia
i think it's a phase kids go through, boys especially with all the fighting.
Proverbs 22:6 "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it". I guess you could start by praying and remind yourself once again that you've committed your child to the Lord and I know parenting isnt easy. There arent any textbooks to give you model answers. But I'm sure God has great plans for your precious boy. (:
22 Feb 2008 12:17pm
adlibitumphotos from Lyon, France
Et cet enfant grandira comme un champignon (ce que l’on dit chez nous) belle photo. Pascal
And this child will exaggerate as a mushroom (what they say to nous) nice photograph. Pascal
22 Feb 2008 12:44pm
Viewfinder from Bradenton, United States
As the father of three grown children, I can assure you that even good, excellent, well-behaved, sweet, and well-taught children are not exempt from the consequences of the fall. Do not blame yourself or think you're a bad parent if he sometimes is less than perfection.
22 Feb 2008 12:52pm
Lorraine from Gatineau, Canada
Excellent photo Sweetie, and keep in mind that LIfe will happen to our children and that we are there to make it better, doesn't mean WE don't get confused LOL
22 Feb 2008 4:42pm
Wayne from Melbourne, Australia
I think you're a great mom Tyan...and I think that the very fact Caleb was so ready to make an admission of guilty can be interpreted as being a good thing...at that age my first reaction was to cover it up and maintain plausible deniability in order to evade punitive action. =D
22 Feb 2008 5:53pm
Nancy from Singapore
Dun be too hard on yourself and on Caleb. He's still learning and they're too young to really differentiate between right and wrong. They only know what is fun and what is not.
23 Feb 2008 6:37am
@Nancy: you are right,i suspect i am morphing into one of those irritating,highly strung parents whom we use to all keep our distance from,heh heh heh.....
bronzebilly u.k. from Barry,Vale of Glamorgan, United Kingdom
Hey tyanmoon..Unclebilly popping in....how goes it pal.???
Just look at this little angel....
Don't forget tyse..his imagination is developing and he'll tell you some more little porky-pies before he realises, and is old enough to know the consequences....I'm glad this one episode has cleared up, however, and hope you are settled in your own mind(it seems that you are..)
Best of luck,pal...
Unclebilly...
23 Feb 2008 11:40pm
Canon IXUS 40
1/10 second
F/2.8
6 mm